All of Me... Positives and Negatives.

Tonight was date night, it wasn't a perfect night to say the least but I tried. We still had fun most of the time, we still held hands and put our perfect child to bed. It wasn't the best idea for a date night when I think back upon it, but live and learn right?

I've been spending the last few hours reading about restaurants, and peoples tips on being romantic, and man is every single person different or what? Everything I read is different than the rest. I can admit that I am not the best at being romantic, and now that life's stress is wearing both myself and Jenn down there it is hard to think that things can be better. I want with all of me to make her happy, to provide her with the over-the-top love that she deserves, the love that I have for her but my mind is making it hard to show. I'm tired of stress, I'm tired of worry, I just want to love.

Love is a magical thing, some will say it's a myth, some will say it's a choice, some will say you'll only love once, others love hundreds of times. Love can come in all shapes and forms, as I love Jenn, and I love my daughter. My love for Jenn outweighs and is much different than the love for my daughter. That's not to say that I wouldn't do anything for my daughter to be happy, and I think that is part of my issue when it comes to finding time to love on Jenn... we are always focused on our daughter. Considering her age, she needs a lot of attention, but we still need to focus on each other, put each other on a pedestal, love on each other and make the other feel special.

Seven days, that is what I am going to attempt, for seven days I am going to try my God's honest hardest to put love before worry, love before stress, and work my way out of this funk, out of this depression like state. I know who I am, I know who I have been, I know whom I can be and what I am is not who I am. I am living in a state of fear, a state of stress and worry, a state where every day I am more concerned about what could go wrong, or where the money is going to come from, or if she's going to leave me, if my child is going to keep on being the perfect human being. Some of those fears and stresses are real, many are a figment of my imagination playing tricks on me. What would life look like if I tried my hardest to wake up in the morning and look at the positive? I honestly don't know.

I am going to head to bed, I am going to pray, and I am going to wake up tomorrow morning and try to look on the bright side of everything. Try to start a day and end a day positively, not let the stress of life ruin those areas of life that I have been blessed in. Tomorrow is a new day, I want to be positive, I want to be happy... is it a choice? I am about to find out...

Cause I'm So Happy?

Yesterday I found a documentary on Netflix simply called "Happy". The description stated that it was to show what made people happy from the Kalkuta slums to the deep south of Louisiana. I figured why not, it has to be interesting, right? It was actually pretty great and made you think about how you look at happiness in your own life. I mean when you really think about it, are you happy? Is happy just another emotion for you or are you truly happy from the heart outwards. I'm going to tackle this question within myself and maybe you'll be led to think about your own life.

Let me look at today as a small sample size first; woke up to feed my daughter, changed her poopy diaper then proceed about the day. Shave, kiss fiancee, dress Ains, put her in car seat, head to church, worship, sermon, communion, quickly communicate with a few people, home, have lunch made for me, play with Ains, watch TV shows, put her down for nap and have time alone with my fiancée to chat and cuddle. Now here I am writing a blog and watching a world junior game between two countries I have no connection to. Pretty boring day right? I beg to differ, and I failed to mention that Ains has teeth starting to come in so she is extremely unpredictable.

I found that so far today has been an overall happy day for me, let's break it down:

1. I wake up to the two most beautiful girls in the morning.

2. I have a God that loves me and I had a chance to once again return that love, while at the same time be taught more about Him and how to grow deeper with Him.

3. Jenn cooked a delicious lunch of pasta while I played with Ains and got to see her giggle and roll around as she has recently learned.

4. Time alone with Jenn is rare, so I will take whatever opportunity I can get.

5. I'm writing and blog while watching hockey and no one has complained yet.

Today is a great day. Our life has a lot of uncertainty in it currently and though that's always present, I choose to look past it and enjoy the life I have. We're exploring all options to make some of those uncertainties into things we no longer need to think about, and as long as I have my little family and my big God, I will choose to be happy as much as possible.

Tomorrow I head back to work with question marks, but I need to turn that avenue of my life into a happy one as well to sustain the happiness at home. I love my job for the most part, so minds well enjoy it as long as I am working it. Financial stresses make it more difficult to enjoy working as you always hope that your job will be enough to sustain your family, but I need to start looking past that and enjoy the chances and opportunities put in front of me.

There's lots of things I'm life that I have chosen to allow me to be depressed and bring those people around me down and ruin their days as well. Happiness though a chemical reaction, is really a choice and having a positive mental attitude is really a sustainable way to maintain your happiness. I'm tired of feeing depressed, sad and like I am not capable, so from this point forward I am going to wake up every morning and write down the the things I am thankful for, the things I have to look forward to that day, and a small goal or two to accomplish every day. I'm determined to live a happy life, which to me will be a successful life.

Until next time! I'm Rob Quick... And these are my ramblings.

The Dawn of A New Age

As the title of my blog says this is merely a blog of my random ramblings. I created the blog in 2010 in order to post a single entry that I feared may get lost in the world of Facebook, I then instantly forgot that it existed. If anyone knows me they know I am a man of few words but writing brings those words out much easier for me. I hope to write on here often, if no one reads it I will have a personal memoir of my thoughts for the rest of my life, or at least until Google deletes them from existence.

What will be posted depends on the day but will likely be focused around those things I enjoy most in life; God, family, hockey, wrestling and randomness. Ask my fiancée if you don't think randomness falls into a thing most enjoyed in life for me... She'll tell you I enjoy the most random things and try to talk about them on a daily basis. So that's that! I'll post often, read what youre interested in reading, skip what you think is lame, comment when you feel led to, maybe we'll have some interesting conversation.

I'm Rob Quick, and these are my ramblings.